Tuesday, July 22, 2008

What Happened??


I'm not sure when it occured, but sometime in the past month my sweet little five year old boy vanished, and in his place arrived a bossy, whiny, back-talking, lying, temper-tantrumy child. I don't know what happened! I looked behind his ears to see if his exterior was a mask to some unruly alien, but all I found was dirt. I was a little disappointed. I guess I was hoping that something as simple as alien reincarnation was my answer...

My son has taken on a whole new demeanor and I am at a loss as to what to do. I try to compliment him when I see him behaving appropriately: "Thank you for holding my hand in the street!" "I like how nicely you made your bed!" "Thank you for helping Ben go down the slide!" "I appreciate your efforts at wiping your own bottom!" etc...

He has began to back-talk me, which either I've never noticed before or it's something brand new. I end up yelling at him to just be quiet and stop talking. Even then he still tries to get the last word in. It's driving me nuts!

But back-talking isn't the only problem: he's resorted back to his toddler years and has started throwing temper tantrums--a lot! Over anything and everything. So I'll calmly look at him and say, "I don't understand you. Use your words." I have been saying this phrase so often lately (to both of my boys) that I accidentally used it on my Hubby the other night. I did something that annoyed him and he complained about it under his breath and before I could stop myself I opened my trap and out tumbled, "I don't understand whining, use your words!" This surprised both of us!

I'm having the hardest time with Jake's attitude about everything in general. I feel like I'm often nagging him because when I say something or ask him to do something just once, I get no results. So that annoys me, naturally, and I result to raising my voice, to which he retaliates with a whiny high-pitched complaint, and the battle ensues...

So to all you mom's out there with kids this age, or that have had kids this age, please help! I'll try anything you throw at me, even if it seems obvious. (And if you have any vegetable-eating advice for my kids, then it'd be great if you could just throw some of that in there too!)

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Out of sheer desperation, I started a "manners jar". When ever I catch one of my kids being good (ie using their manners, accepting life's unfairness with graciousness, being kind, speaking with respect to adults) I compliment them and say to "add a point to the manners jar". My two are working as a team, so if one gets to put in one point, the other is to say, "good job".

I told them that when it's filled they get to do something special. They have really bought into this. They seem happier and so I am much happier.

It was nothing fancy, just some glass pebbles from the dollar store (we were originally looking for marbles) and a tall plastic cup. It worked for me!

benjiboo said...

I LOVE that idea! What a fun way to encourage manners. Thanks for the great idea!